Aw Dr. Gagarin, I can relate to your strictness, it’s kind of amusing but also intimidating to learn about you! I do understand that it’s also natural, especially as a parent, to be authoritative. 3 months without video games seems reasonable for a child to go through; it is admirable that you took ownership for it and were able to express remorse.
I can be a strict person myself, I have blocked many people from accessing me for not understanding or complying with my rationale, or even for failing to love and treat me proportionate to what I feel I’m worth.
I can also strict on myself and others if given the power and authority. I think i’m supposed to eventually soften up though the better life gets for me, i have been living in a sort of vacuum.
HAHAHA my partner also has very low bandwidth to listen to my points, we are eventually going to break up because of this. I realised it’s a mismatch in life stage and values. He is much older than me. We are grieving the fact that we have to separate. The five years we have been together he was unable to truly listen and cooperate with me. I have been completely gaslit. He has very little capacity to listen and co-create new outcomes.
But he did teach me several things including how to use the stove and oven and he is a natural provider at heart. I’m thankful for having met him but it is over between us 💔
I appreciate that we have become resilient after every argument and conflict and disappointment, which is what I think you are alluding to in your Japanese gold patching analogy.
Well, that's obviously a gross simplification and reduction of relationships, even a pessimistic one because not every relationship ends in rupture, but yes, this thought that life is uncertain does cause great anxiety in young people and even in adults. The more we get older and understand life, the more we become mature, we realise what the factors are that create and increase certainty, stability and security in one's life and in life all together collectively and globally. Then we work toward obtaining them and abiding by them.
Aw Dr. Gagarin, I can relate to your strictness, it’s kind of amusing but also intimidating to learn about you! I do understand that it’s also natural, especially as a parent, to be authoritative. 3 months without video games seems reasonable for a child to go through; it is admirable that you took ownership for it and were able to express remorse.
I can be a strict person myself, I have blocked many people from accessing me for not understanding or complying with my rationale, or even for failing to love and treat me proportionate to what I feel I’m worth.
I can also strict on myself and others if given the power and authority. I think i’m supposed to eventually soften up though the better life gets for me, i have been living in a sort of vacuum.
HAHAHA my partner also has very low bandwidth to listen to my points, we are eventually going to break up because of this. I realised it’s a mismatch in life stage and values. He is much older than me. We are grieving the fact that we have to separate. The five years we have been together he was unable to truly listen and cooperate with me. I have been completely gaslit. He has very little capacity to listen and co-create new outcomes.
But he did teach me several things including how to use the stove and oven and he is a natural provider at heart. I’m thankful for having met him but it is over between us 💔
I appreciate that we have become resilient after every argument and conflict and disappointment, which is what I think you are alluding to in your Japanese gold patching analogy.
Thank you for sharing.
There is only one thing that is certain about life - that life is uncertain.
I think relationships are like ships at sea - we meet, may travel together for a while, then separate.
It is heavy.
Well, that's obviously a gross simplification and reduction of relationships, even a pessimistic one because not every relationship ends in rupture, but yes, this thought that life is uncertain does cause great anxiety in young people and even in adults. The more we get older and understand life, the more we become mature, we realise what the factors are that create and increase certainty, stability and security in one's life and in life all together collectively and globally. Then we work toward obtaining them and abiding by them.
I agree but i think it is not so much accumulation of certainty but acceptance that we only can be certain in one thing - life is uncertain.